Ho. Lee. Hell.

Today I experienced for the first time the organizational mecca that is THE CONTAINER STORE. (cue angels singing)

Seriously. I had always had a sneaking suspicion that I would love that place, and today while I was wandering the sidewalks of Clarendon (and cursing the fact that I thought boots with heels were a good choice for the day) I wandered right into the Container store. And it was all so beautiful that I came very close to sitting down in the middle of the store and crying. I am not even kidding. I am that hormonal that containers and shelves could make me cry.

I am not an organized person by any means. But the thought of everything being organized and labeled and neat and tidy… I just… I can’t even form sentences when I think of it, apparently.

When I worked at Starbucks, they called me the organizational Nazi. I maintain that there was nothing facist about me, I just wanted everything to be labeled and placed in a way that expedited the making of delicious hot and cold beverages. Also muffins. And scones. And a variety of other pastries. No but seriously, I would look at, say, the cabinet underneath the drive-thru register. And I would plan out the best use of that space. Then I would pull all the crap out of there, clean it well, and then fully stock it with the items I thought fit best. I would then leave it there a few days, to give it a chance to evolve and to make sure it was as functional as possible, and then once it had settled into a truly useful arrangement, I would draw a diagram showing what went where, and tape it to the inside of the cabinet door. And then I would obsessively make sure that it remained well stocked. I know, I’m weird, but I adored stocking shelves. People would groan and complain about unpacking the order each week but I relished opening up those boxes and putting things where they belonged, watching those shelves just fill up to par. Don’t even get me started with how much I loved restocking the retail shelves.

But truly, if people had cooperated with me more, I think it actually would have really made our store flow much better. There were a few baristas that were on board, though most just laughed at me. I did not care. I organized the shit out of that cabinet. And the other one. And all the fridges. And the shelves in the back. And yeah. Loved every second of it. I also loved counting the money and making sure it matched up with the correct totals for each day, but that’s a story for another time.

Today I am all about organizing. Which, as I mentioned, is pretty hilarious because in my day-to-day life I am the most scatterbrainy type of person there is. My desk is one big pile of crap, my bedroom is covered in laundry, the dining room table is a dumping ground for mail and things I bring in from the car.

I think if I had custom organizational tools from The Container Store I would be set. Everything would be nice and beautiful and shiny and there would be sunlight and rainbows and I would magically have hardwood floors instead of ugh wall-to-wall carpet in the entire damn house and angels would sing and birds would tie ribbons in my hair and also I would make dinner every night wearing pearls.

Also, baby would sleep for more than 20 minutes at a time and I would no longer have to choose between taking a nap and writing a love letter to organization.

ps. This is a cupcake container.

It is a CONTAINER for a SINGLE CUPCAKE and when I saw this I nearly peed myself for the sheer beauty and holy CRAP WHO THINKS OF A CONTAINER FOR A CUPCAKE?!?!?!?!

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